The irony of this title is just perfect after today. I titled this last night and just left this tab open, waiting for when I’d have time to sit down and write…
I swear I set my alarm clock, but my phone was against me today. I woke up on my own at 7:26, and am usually at work at 7:20… After the quickest shower of my life, feeding the cats (mention 1), making a lunch, and getting dressed, I was out the door and walked into my classroom at 8:00 on the dot! Thank goodness for my aide! So to answer the all encompassing question of this title…this morning, nope, I was not ready. But I made it. And today was good! (cue The Bangles, Manic Monday)
Spring break flew by fast as always. Two major differences were present this year that I hadn’t experienced in years past: no Adam on break and no cat (mention 2), to cuddle with. With Adam’s new job being in the tech world and no longer on a teacher’s schedule, him working different times than I is something I’m getting more accustomed to as time goes on. I suppose the same is true for the lack of a cat (mention 3), however, since Pavel’s time with us ended so recently, I was kind of dreading being completely home alone.
Adam worked during the holidays, and of course he did not get a snow day nor have MLK Day or President’s day, or a winter break off. But on all those days, I still had Pavel (mentions 4 and 5). Not true this past week. I was on my own. And it was fine. I didn’t mind waking up when Adam went to work in the morning. I was okay getting out of bed and just eating cereal on the couch. I also filled my days with many activities so there wasn’t much wallowing happening. Are you ever ready for a fur baby to leave you? Easy answer to that… No. Never. But when weighed with a heartbreaking existence, the choice was clear.
The funny thing is, I now understand a belief my dad holds and has repeated often in the past 20 years. Before I was even born, my parents had a very large, black Chow Chow named Bear. Bear was full of fur and always 100% on guard. He was vicious to anyone who wasn’t us. As a tot, I used to put all of my mom’s 80’s costume jewelry on him and read him books as I sipped some juice from a Care Bear’s sippy cup. I remember when Bear had to be put to sleep. I was 8 and the Lion King had just come out that summer. My mom went about 1 week without a dog, and just as my dad was convinced he’d never have another, we welcomed Simba, a Chow Chow mix, cinnamon in color, and the happiest dog I’ll ever know. My dad did not really bond with his new 4 legged friend easily. Simba was clearly my mom’s dog. And I remember my dad very clearly telling people, “Yeah, Simba is alright, but Bear! Bear was a true Chow Chow!”, and “Bear was the best dog!”, (he’d even say that as he pet Simba!). He did eventually get close with Simba in the end, but still to this day, no dog will ever be as high up there as Bear is in my dad’s eyes. And I get it. Pavel was special (mention 6). We miss him and are very open to talking about him. I do recall trying not to compare my childhood cat Mimi with Pavel (mentions 7 and 8), and that goes away as time goes by. Here’s to hoping that is also true as time goes on with our new fur babies, Marty McFly and Prince/Ferris/Adam Can’t Make Up His Mind. Are we ready for new fur babies? They’re here, and we have what we need for them, so in this case, yes, we’re ready (mentions 9 and 10)!
In other news, life struggles are very real again for those around me. With regards to cancer, life choices, money, and relationships… you may never be ready for what’s about to come. You may be at the beginning, middle, or end of it and not be ready. But the world keeps turning. Your heart keeps beating. Life keeps happening all around us. Even if you’re not ready, you at least can be as unprepared and uneasy and uncertain with those you love, not completely alone.
And just because the sweet ain’t as sweet without the sour… in good news, (aside from being a cat momma again <mention 11>), weddings are happening for some of my favorite people this year! Babies are going to be joining this world (or recently have already), to families I love. And again, asking “Are you ready?”… well, for some of you, that may be something you haven’t asked yourself, but it wouldn’t hurt to. New lives are coming into this world if you’re ready or not. Those truly big steps in life, they’re happening… true moments to wake up and shake up if need be! If not, if you answered yes, you’re ready, then okay. Safe travels and may your journey be fruitful. If it is not, may you have the courage to know so and fix you as needed.
My spring break was decent. Took in a Red Wings game with Adam and friends (we won!), had a lunch date with Momma Whitford (La Pita is always delicious!), attended a baby shower and met friends for a much needed dinner (cake and Mexican Gardens is always delicious!), met our new fur babies (mention 12), and had crepes (lunch with Sarah is always fantastic!), and cleaned the house to the best it’s been since we moved in (a day off with Adam is a joy!). Was I ready for it to be over and go back to work? … no, but what choice is there? I did start missing conversations with kids, but I also will miss cat cuddles (mention 13), waking up naturally, and wearing comfys all day long.
My plan tonight is to get everything ready for the day tomorrow. Clothes, work bag, lunch bag, coffee pot, bath towels… everything in it’s right place so I can leave on time! Keep your fingers crossed that my alarm clock is actually working on my phone. Yes, I am ready… for bed and a Tuesday. Sweet dreams and get ready, life happens even if you aren’t!